Essay 1 - 9 (2)

Instruction
Please read the essays again, and evaluate according to the following instructions which are the official instructions that Chinese markers are given when rating university entrance exam writing in English.

1. The maximum score is 25. Please rate according to five levels: (20-25) excellent; (15-20) good; (10-15) moderate; (5-10) poor; (1-5) very poor.
2. Evaluators should firstly narrow the holistic score down to certain level, and then confirm or adapt it by measuring the composition according to the requirements. After that, evaluators should give the final score.
3. 2 points should be deducted if the words are less than 120 or more than 180.
4. The following factors should be focused on in the evaluation: content, the quality and quantity of vocabulary and grammatical structure, coherence and language appropriateness.
5. Spelling and punctuation are relevant to language accuracy. Evaluators should consider how they influence the communication. Vocabulary spelling and usage of British and American English are both acceptable.

essay (1) In China, many students play instruments for both hobby and a way to go to better school. However, some of students family think practice instrument may influence their kids study badly. But actually, that just an excuse for their poor grade. For students, we arent professional instrument player, we neednt pay more than 2h a day in training. Just such little time wont influence you very much. Although you practice 3 hours a day, there are still at least 3 hours for you to spend. If you want to improve your study grade, you can use these 3 hours fully. A little of patriarches say the training of instrument may be distractive---thats not convictive at all. Its just because he or she doesnt put his or her attention on study. Its good that many students play instrument happily. But when someone want to blame instrument which makes him distractive, it goes so far. People play instruments instead of instruments playing theirselves and make you distractive.

Holistic score of essay (1)

the writer meets all requirements and goals of the task and covers all relevant aspects of the topic.

the writer meets all requirements and goals of the task. The writer omits 1 or 2 less-important aspects of the topic, but covers all important aspects of the topic.

the writer generally meets all requirements and goals of the task. the writer omits some less-important aspects of the topic, but covers all important aspects of the topic.

the writer does not properly meet the requirements and goals of the task. The writer omits or does not articulate some important aspects of the topic,and writes some irrelevant topics.

the writer does not meet the requirements and goals of the task at all. the writer largely omits important aspects of the topic and writes some irrelevant topics, possibly because the writer does not understand the writing task.

The writer shows a strong competence of using various vocabularies, with few mistakes (if any) resulting from attempts to use advanced vocabularies.

The writer is generally able to use vocaubalries correctly, with few mistakes (if any) resulting from attempts to use advanced vocabularies.

There are some vocabulary mistakes found,but they do not compromise understanding.

The writer uses limited vocabularies. There are some vocabulary mistakes found, and thus they compromise understanding.

The writer uses limited vocabularies. There is a large number of vocabulary mistakes found, and thus they compromise understanding.

The writer shows a strong competence of applying various grammar structures, with few mistakes (if any) resulting from attempts to use advanced grammars.

The writer is generally able to apply grammar structures correctly, with few mistakes (if any) resulting from attempts to use advanced grammars.

There are some grammartical mistakes found,but they do not compromise understanding.

The writer uses limited grammar structures. There are some grammartical mistakes found, and thus they compromise understanding.

The writer uses limited grammar structures. There is a large number of grammartical mistakes found, and thus they compromise understanding.

Cohesive devices between sentences are well used to make the composition coherent.

Simple cohesive devices between sentences are used to make the composition coherent.

Some simple cohesive devices between sentences are used to make the composition almost coherent.

Few cohesive devices between sentences are used; the composition lacks coherence.

There is no cohesive devices between sentences; the composition is not coherent.

Very good

Good

Moderate

Poor

Very poor

essay (2) I think music could facilitate my study in high school. Because it will be necessary for me to relax. If I am very exhausted for writing lots of homework, I can take my instrument and relax myself. On the other hand, the instrument can help me to go to a good university. Or rather, it is a good comfort for me that I have some way to decrease the minimum passing score. What is more, I think we join in the orchestra in the high school can broaden our horizen and tell us the importance of team work. Both of them are good for us during the high school. Either in our life or in study.

Holistic score of essay (2)